Straight Aero - Jeff Thomas

"I don't smoke, I don't sniff glue and I don't hang with the cats who do", sings Jeff Thomas, who, despite having a name like a second division footballer in his testimonial year, contributes the first of this week's gems.

I don't use cigarettes or solvents either, Jeff. In fact I don't take any substances that have to be injected, inhaled or snorted. I'm not too-keen on anything that's been coated in breadcrumbs either.

This ode to the straight laced is a top slice of major label pop psychedelia, only let down by the Red Indian rain dance instrumental breaks; breaks as jarring and disorientating as the Ted Danson cameo in Saving Private Ryan.

Straight Aero's lazy, catchy narrative ensures that it should find a home on any perfect pop compilation or even on the soundtrack to a nature documentary about urban foxes.

> Download this (4.4 MB)

You'll Always Find Me In the Kitchen at Parties - Jona Lewie

"I'm no good at chatting up and I always get rebuffed" deadpans monotone estuary Yuletide hit-maker Jona Lewie. Maybe it's because you're the man who sung that novelty song about stopping the cavalry and the ladies are keeping their distance.

I can relate to Jona's plight. At parties I'm always found standing by the sink, pretending to read the label on the cheap bottle of wine I've brought while everyone else is talking something called 'the property ladder'.

'You'll always find me in the Kitchen at Parties...' is just the right side of novelty pop and with an all-girl chorus that falls somewhere between Shadow Morton and the Human League. Shame about the Fisher Price electronic jig break in the middle; a break as jarring and disorientating as the Jim Davidson cameo in Peter Greenaway's 'A Zed and Two Noughts.'

> Download this (2.6 MB)

Manifesto & Book News

If it's ever been on K-Tel or Ronco, it's in. If it features hand claps, cow bells, syrupy orchestration, walls of sound, wrecking crews, sha-la-las, toothy teen idols, candy-based metaphors for carnal acts or lyrics about hugging, squeezing and rocking all night long, it's in.

Makin' the scene, ya know what I mean



> Martin Lampen (latest book news, contact details and other stuff)

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